Author Archives: Bianca

Spilling the beans

Recently I posted on Facebook that I might be getting some good news soon.
Well, I did, but I didn’t wanna say anything until everything was set in stone because I didn’t wanna set myself up for a let down again.
However, that is no longer an issue. Contracts are signed, money has been paid and tomorrow at 3
I’m picking up the keys to my new apartment! YYAAYY!
It’s a 2 bedroom, ground floor,in a house that isn’t even completely don’t being built yet.
It’s very expensive for its size, but it comes with an underground parking garage spot, some other stuff I don’t much care about and a patio adjacent to the livingroom and a chunk of backyard.
It also has a GIANT storage room in the basement (enough for my bike and ALL my strollers lol).
And about the money, I would have LOVED to get something older and cheaper, but all the places I looked at either don’t want kids in the house or didn’t want to rent to me because they are worried about my finances.
Which is ironic because by not renting to me they forced me to take something I can barely afford.
Which leads me to the only real downside, I’m gonna have to share the place with my M0m.
Not only because of finances, but more importantly, convenience.
She can’t stay with my dad (they have been divorced for almost 10 years) she can’t find her own place around here and if she has to watch my kids 4 evenings a week anyway, she might as well live with me.
Hopefully in a year or so we can change this arrangement, but it will have to work for now.

We are getting the keys a little early so we can get the place ready, since we are the first tenants there is a lot to do (don’t ask me what though, when I looked at the place it didn’t even have doors/floors yet lol)
official move-in date is march 1st, so we will have plenty of time to get the place ready, of course it helps that we don’t have a set move-out date, if it takes a few days longer to get our beds over there, it wont matter 🙂

I’m really excited and cant wait to go and look at the (mostly)  finished place tomorrow!


First day of School

My first day of school was quite interesting. My teachers are great.

German teacher, laid back dude in his 30’s, easy to get along with, hopefully also easy to learn from. We shall see.

My english teacher, great woman, full of positivity, yet able to put her foot down.
Doesnt strike me as the type that will put up with much bullshit from her students.
Made me her “assistant” and asked me to only speak english in class so everyone else can get used to hearing it. No problem there lol.

My math teacher is pretty strict, friendly, good sense of humor, but as I said, very strict.
She put a kid out in the hall not once but twice for talking in her very first lesson.
Which sucked for me cuz I sit right by the door and had to freeze my ass off, but oh well.
I’m a big girl, I can handle it 😛
She also didn’t waste any time and started teaching us math right in the first lesson, would have even given us homework if she hadn’t forgotten to make copies. I was actually sad I didn’t get any. (go ahead and laugh :p)

That’s all the teachers I’ve met so far, I think we’ll get one or 2 more, one is sick right now though.

As for the students, we are a class of about 26 or so. 7 girls, the rest guys.
Our first assignment for german was to interview one person we didn’t know (no problems there lol) and later introduce them to the rest of the class.
Fun exercise.
During these introductions, I picked out a few people from the crowd where I thought: “These are the people I wanna get to know” (1 girl, 4 guys)
And what do you know? In our break after the lesson, I sat at a table telling my new “friend” about things I’m sure she couldn’t care less about and as all the smokers came back upstairs, all the people I had found interesting, made their way to my table one by one, without any effort on my part.
One of them is a girl who is a member of an organization that makes and sells porn to save the rainforest.
One has over 20 spiders and a scorpion.
One is a drummer/guitarist/singer who is left-handed and wants to quit smoking.
One would make a great politician, he always thinks for a few seconds before carefully avoiding actually answering a question.
And the rest I havent yet had time to get to know.
Of course most of them are MUCH younger than me, but that only makes it more interesting.

I cant wait to go back and learn more, not only about math and whatnot, but also about my classmates. They or We have the potential to become a great group of students. Or at least not be at each others throats in a few weeks lol.

Oh and before I forget. the first day we actually got let out an hour early because the roads suddenly iced over and they wanted us to get home before it got worse. it was so bad that a girl who went outside to smoke slipped and cracked her head open and was taken away by an ambulance. As a matter of fact, from the moment that happened you could hear one ambulance after another passing the building. It was quite scary. Since I’m being picked up by my dad, I had to call him and it took him about 30 minutes to get there, so I had the pleasure of standing outside in the freezing cold for 30 minutes waiting. yay.  :/

Well I suppose that’s enough information for one day (this is actually the accumulated information of 2 days) hope I didn’t bore you too much.

Feeling a bit guilty

Tomorrow I start school.
If I don’t go to school and get my Diploma (german: Realschulabschluss) then I will never be able to get a decent Job and will most definitely NOT be able to become a midwife, which is what I really want. I NEED to go to school, for myself and for my kids.
due to some unforeseen circumstances, I have to go to a school that is more than twice as far from here as I had planned (because the one I was originally going to go to stopped offering this course due to budget cuts) and because I was so late to sign up, I couldn’t get into the morning classes, so now I will have school from  5-10 pm plus a 30 minute commute each way.
Not only will this interfere with my little ones breastfeeding and cosleeping since he will be asleep by the time I come home, but it also means after the summer, I will only get to see Lee in the mornings when I take him to preschool, because he will be staying there till 4.30 pm to get his therapy and whatnot, which is when I will have to leave for school and he will be alseep when I get home.
When I signed up for the class I asked them that, if a spot opens up in the morning, to please let me have it.
And they said they will definitely put me at the top of the list because of my kids, however if I start skipping school or my performance drops, they will give it to someone else.
I feel so guilty for spending so much time away from my kids and I havent even started yet!

Sick and tired

but mostly just sick.

And not just me, the whole Family.
Well, Lee (my 3-year-old) is doing better, he has been getting antibiotics all week.
Which is just making my life harder because he is bouncing off the walls and can’t understand why mommy doesnt wanna play with him right now.
And worst of all, the baby is sick too.
It breaks my heart watching him cough and sneeze and be miserable 😦 He is too weak and tired to eat baby food, so he has been nursing more often, which I’m hoping will help him recover quickly, however, if he is not better by morning, I’m going to take him to the doctor.

On a more positive note, I weighed in today at 201.9 lbs, which is down exactly 2 lbs since last week. Im hoping to break the 200 lbs mark next week. My BMI is 27.96.
Im down 11.1 lbs since I started 5 weeks ago. Yay me!

First Run

I’ve been wanting to run for a while now, but it was always too cold and then I had problems with my ankle,  so when it started to feel better I decided I would go for my first run the next day.
I had already looked up a few ideas on how to get started, since I’m out of shape and overweight, I didn’t wanna over- or underdo it.
I had already planned a route that I usually take when riding my bike, where no one would see my first pathetic attempts.
The couch to 5k plan says to do a 5 minute warm up walk, which I stretched to 8 minutes to get to a point where I knew I would be alone.
By the time I got there the baby was asleep in the stroller.
You’re supposed to start with intervals of 60 seconds of running and 90 seconds walking, for a total of 20 minutes.
For me it worked out to be more like 60 seconds of running and 120 of walking for a total of 15 minutes, but I figured I’m
A) pushing a heavy stroller that is NOT made for running and
B) Combined with my 8 minutes of warm up (that I still had to walk back) I think I did pretty good.

The best part?

I was SO proud of myself afterwards.
I felt great and had a ton of energy for the rest of the day.

I was gonna go again today but Lee had a doctor’s appointment in the morning so he wasnt going to preschool.
However, I still got a bit of exercise because on the way home, Lee couldn’t walk anymore (he’s still a little sick, though the antibiotics he is on are helping tons) so I carried him.
About a quarter-mile from our house I saw an old lady and her bicycle lying in the middle of the road. There was a man there already helping so I asked if there was anything I could do to help and she asked me to go to her house and tell her Son what happened,So I asked her for the address, repeated it back to her and started walking as fast as I could to her house (whilst carrying my 35 lbs kid the whole time) it wasnt far (half a mile) I let the son know, he said he would go to her and that was it. I still had to carry Lee the quarter-mile back to our house, poor kid was almost frozen solid 😦
That was my excercise for the day.

Tomorrow, if it’s not too cold, I plan to practise running again 🙂


Let me start off by introducing myself:

Hello, my name is Bianca. I was born and raised in Germany, but have spent most of my adult life in the United States.
I was married to a soldier for 7 years, but that didnt work out.
Out of this relationship came 2 beautiful little boys, Lee (3.5 years old) and Dean (born August 2010).
I left my husband, the US  and the life of an Army Wife behind when I was 6 months pregnant with Dean and flew home to Germany to move back in with my parents.
Due to some shortcomings on my own as well as my soon-to-be ex husbands part, I never finished school and have no green card, so I wasnt able to get a drivers license either.
Why am I telling you all this?

Because I’m starting over.

I’m currently in the middle of getting my drivers license (passed the theory, need a few more hours before I can do the practical test), I just signed up for school to get my diploma (Realschulabschluss) and another important part, I’ve gained a lot of weight since getting pregnant with my first, so I will be using this blog to document my journey to get thinner, healthier, smarter and… drivers license-ier…. lol.

PS: In case you are wondering, the name of the blog is not a typo. It is a combination of several things. Thick & thin, obvious, I’m trying to lose weight. it is also an Avenged Sevenfold song (from their first album “Sounding the seventh trumpet”) however that was already taken, plus I wanted to incorporate the school part, hence the “think”.

Thanks for reading, hope you will come with me on my journey to improve myself 🙂